Archive for the Uncategorized Category

Of..Pride and Prejudice

Posted in Uncategorized on September 12, 2018 by otakujade

I’ve watched this movie half a dozen times, probably. Mostly, the two latest versions – one with Keira Knightly which is my favorite and the other the one with Alan Rickman, which I watched because of him particularly. But that is not why I am here now….

I know I haven’t been writing on my blog for so long…years probably, I’ve been intending to start writing again but time and all the distractions of life kept me from it. Especially now with this new profession I entered,  barely have time for personal things much less pleasure such as what these blogs afford me. But now I have something to say, to express which I daresay Facebook or any other social media sites cannot offer.

As I earlier mentioned I have watched this movie and read the book several times but it is only now that it has affected me so deeply. There are circumstances in my life which changed my perspective about the story and which made me appreciate it even more. I am especially drawn towards the unique but very admirable relationship between Elizabeth Bennet and her father. She wasn’t the loveliest nor the liveliest and certainly she was very critical of their ways but she was her father’s favorite and so he allows her certain privileges her other sisters do not enjoy.

Their relationship hit me so hard this time, having lost my own father just a few weeks ago. I guess I haven’t stopped grieving, not you actually can stop grieving the lost of one so dear…but I haven’t cried as much as I needed to I guess. I have kept myself busy in order to keep my mind off things, but I think that was wrong. I feel guilty that I haven’t grieved my father’s lost enough…when my brother and sister cried their hearts out I tried to keep a straight face; when they spoke during our father’s internment I pretended to be busy with something so I wouldn’t have to go and say something, I know I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face then; and his casket was being lowered in the grave, I felt numb all over and kept to myself. My husband being what he is, didn’t know how to help me either.

But what my brother said during the internment service was true, Papa had trouble expressing his affections, and so we, all three of us, inherited the same trait. It’s easy to write about it as I do not but expressing my emotions face to face, that’s the challenge. Oh we all know Papa loved, he showed us so in so many ways – not expressedly but suggestively. Papa worked his way to a comfortable life, he came to the city with no money and no connections but he able to make a good life for himself and his family. Both our parents were entrepreneur, but Papa having the luxury of managing his own time made sure that he is able to join us, his children, during meals. Mama showed her affections for us in a different way of course, and we never felt we were unloved or anything like so but Papa notably really made time for us. He would leave his tailoring shop at 11:30 AM so he could have lunch with whoever of us children were at home at the time and then around 1:00 PM he would return to his shop. He would be home again at 7:00 PM just in time for dinner and would stay with us the rest of the night. He would leave again after having breakfast with us the next day. That was his routine until he decided to retire 15 years ago, when my siblings and I were already established and have families of our own.

I guess Lizzie’s relationship with her father hit me so hard because I see myself in her. I have always been a Papa’s girl, though Papa never dictated our choices he would always have a strong opinion about them but with me he had always been very tolerant. Even to my choice of husband, in this way my husband was like Mr. Darcy though less privileged, people are wary of him because he, husband, have trouble socializing and he has trouble talking to people about mundane things or striking up a conversation. But Papa, understood all that. When  my husband and I have issues, I know that it took Papa great efforts to approach me and just talk about it. He didn’t give any opinion about the issues we were having but he was just there so I can talk and in his unique way of doing he made me feel better and more confident about myself. And that another thing, Papa raised us to be proud of who were are, to be confident of our abilities and to have courage to take on any challenges – thus, people see us, siblings, as having very strong personalities and that was thanks to our father.

And I miss him so much. I live so close to my parents’ home that before I would often just pop into their house entering through the back door and say hello to him. Or find him on the terrace, wave up at him and ask him how his day have been or wave good bye as I leave for work or remind him not to stay too long in the terrace as it gets hot towards noon and that’s not good for his BP. Now, I can’t do that anymore…. What hurts me most was the last time I saw him – about a day before he had his cardiac arrest – I saw him sitting by the window and I went to him, we talked for a few minutes and I left because I needed to go to my own physical therapy. How I wished I had hugged him or kissed him before I left that day instead of simply squeezing his hand. I kissed him at the ICU, I wouldn’t hug him because of all the tubes in his body and the machine he was hooked on to, but I wonder even then if he would still hear me say that I love him or even feel my lips on his forehead.

Dear Papa, I miss you so much. I know that we’re all grown up and established now but I still miss your presence. For the first time my life I don’t have you, the one person I aim to always please and make proud. I do my best because I didn’t want to disappoint you; it makes me so happy to hear talk about our accomplishments to your friends and relatives and I miss hearing the genuine pride I hear as you tell your stories – how a simple man who only graduated six grade was able to establish himself and send all 3 of his children to respectable private schools. We were the first generation of college graduates from your side of the family and we will make sure that our children will be able to finish college too because we know it’s important to you. You have always regretted not being able to finish school but have  we your children have always been proud of how much you’ve taught yourself. You have left us with the legacy of thirst for knowledge, the courage to persevere, and the give of faith that we all endeavor to pass on to our children and we will teach them to pass these on to their children and their children’s children as well. You were our bond Papa, and we will make sure that your passing will not draw us apart but will pull us closer. Rest now Papa, we miss you but we will carry on and we will take care of Mama for you. I love you Papa.   

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Coming Home…

Posted in Uncategorized on November 28, 2016 by otakujade

This is silly! I have written so many posts here for years..and then I had to stop not wanting my personal troubles to spill over on my writings…and so, here I am now – still challenged by uncertainly but having that need to write just like before, when I started this page. The only problem now….how the heck do I begin again???

It’s weird that I have written so many posts for so long, been all over the place and now I really don’t know what do say. I want desperately to write about something that my readers would enjoy, something that would capture their attention and yet here I am lost and uncertain…Sheesh! What happened?

So here I am…writing whatever comes to mind hoping through this I would be able to awaken my muse once again and she would bless me with interesting things to write about. Hoping that my next posts wouldn’t be about just simple musings but something informative and at the same time amusing; a post that would once again capture attention.

In the last 3 years I wasn’t here a lot has changed. I have started on a new career – teaching – and as I write this I am here inside our classroom, my students scattered all around the room working on their individual tasks. I so wanted to share with them this blog but not just right now. I really don’t have anything interesting for them to read but may, definitely later, I will share with them this page and let them judge for themselves what their mentor is all about.

A Wife’s Forgiving Heart…

Posted in Uncategorized on September 9, 2013 by otakujade

There are days when I literally have so much to write about but can’t decide which one to actually get down to writing….this is one of those days. Right now I decided to write about something that hit quite close to home.

Just last week another sex video scandal broke out and became viral on the internet. Wally Bayola was one of the main stay and half of the comedy act of Wally and Jose from the primetime noon show Eat Bulaga was caught on camera having sex a member of the show’s regular dancers, the EB Babes. On the video, Wally was clearly identified as was the woman, having consensual sex and clearly making a play for the camera. It was obvious they knew the act was being recorded as they both smiled for the camera after they were both satisfied.

The sex video came out on Tuesday morning, September 3, 2013, and immediately went viral. By late afternoon on the same day most copies of the video on the internet had been taken down, but if one knew how to look and where to look, they still find it online. From Youtube to Facebook, to private blogs the sex video was the talk to the next few days. It even got shared and passed on via mobile phones.
The management and staff of the noontime show Eat Bulaga, wisely decided to keep their mouths shut about the incident and allowed the issue to take its natural course; when asked directly about the incident the casts of the show simply said they will allow Wally and EB Babe Yosh, to explain their side of the story.

Now, just this morning news again broke the media that Wally’s wife had decided to forgive him and accept him back. This again started numerous reactions from netizen all over the country; some agreeing with the decision, some not; others gave their opinion on why she did what she did. But most, agreed that the woman should be admired for her decision.

As a wife, I understand her decision. Someone once told me, a spouse will always be a spouse until you sign a piece of paper saying your ties have been severed and even until then that person no matter how bad or how idiotic he had been will always be a part of you. Many feminists will deny the truth of that statement but a wife with a long history with her husband would know that this is true. That no matter how you try to deny it, you cannot hide from the fact that that person is or was a part of you…and that if he had been a good husband up till that point you as a wife will always opt to save the marriage, and save the family.

So yes, Mrs. Bayola’s decision did not come as a surprise to many housewives, someone who have not gone through the same experience, might say that if the same thing happened to them they would immediately leave the husband but wait until they’ve been in the same situation and standing on the same shoes, more often than not they would make the same decision as Wally’s wife did. That is if the husband is not abusive and as I mentioned up to that point when his infidelity was found out, had been a good husband, an excellent provider and a loving father. However, if the husband is abusive then by all means leave the bastard and kick him in the groin before you shut the door.

Ligo na u; Lapit na Me by Eros Atalia

Posted in Books, Uncategorized on November 29, 2012 by otakujade

Tagalog ang lengwahe ng librong ito, kaya minabuti kong Tagalog din ang gamiting lengwahe sa blog ukol sa librong ito. Pero tulad ng una, pasensya na kung mahahaluan ito ng English kasi nga tulad ng una ko nang sinabi mas comportable ako sa lengwaheng iyo sa pagpapahayag ng mga nasa isipan ko.

First and foremost, I just want to say that I liked the book very much. Medyo may parte nga lang sa unahan na mabagal (sa aking opinion lang naman yun at wala akong balak na mangumbinsi ng ibang tao) pero mabilis din naming napawi at na remedyuhan iyong ng author.

Maganda at maayos ang pagkakasulat ng akda, malinaw at madaling maintindihan ng magbabasa. May konti mga typos ang libro pero ano ba, kahit naman mga English novels eh mga typos. Human error yun at di na dapat pang bigyan ng malaking importansya. Na-mention ko lang naman sya dahil minsan nagiging isyu ito sa critique ng mga foreign novels pero sa akin ok lang, di naman affected yung pagbabasa ko o yung ganda ng akda eh.

As for the story itself, it is very realistic. I am actually glad that someone actually decided to take on this topics here and now. Yung topic kasi ng story ay isang bagay na talaga namang nangyayari sa tunay kaso nga walang gusting umamin ng may mentalidad na ganito ang ibang kababaihan. Maraming mapupupulot na aral mula sa libro, maraming masaya, makakatuwa at makakahalakhak na pangyayari ang talaga naming makaka-relate ang mga mambabasa. Madalas sa pagbabasa ko ng akdang ito nangingiti akong mag-isa, minsa’y nagtatawang mag-isa na ikikagugulat ng mga kasama sa bahay, at kung minsan nama’y magbubuntung-hininga dahil sa panghihinayang.

The film adaptation of the book with the same title was released in 2011 through Cinemalaya, however, as can be expected only a few have heard of the film (probably, mostly fans of indie films) and had the opportunity of watch it.

The story of the book revolved around the life and struggle of one ordinary looking and economically challenged college graduating student, Karl Vladimir Lennon J. Villalobos.  I’m sure kung talaga bang sanay lang ako sa mga pangalang kakaiba pero as much as the author tried to evoke woe on the character being burdened with such a name…sa akin wala lang. Okay lang naman yung mahaba nyang pangalan.

Buhay at pag-ibig sama ang hinanakit ito ni Karl Vladimir Lennon J. Villalobos na na-in-love sa classmate nyang si Jen. Parang beauty and the beast ang story with a little twist. Si Karl normal na estudyante, di pangit pero di din naman hunk at tulad ng maraming estudyante laging kapos sa pera. Si Jen naman (walang apelyido) school beauty, mayaman at pantasya ng bayan pero obvious na may malalim na problema sa buhay. Two very different people who ended up together in a relationship na di naman sila pero parang sila – sa wikang English ang makabagong tawag dito eh “Friend with Benefits” at sa parte ni Karl…what a benefit! May fucking buddy na sya, libre pa ang lahat. Pero hwag naman isiping nagte-take advantage sya (di naman masyado) kasi kahit papano marunong pa rin syang mahiya (kay Jen). Kaya nga pag may extra pera sya pa rin ang sumasagot ng pambayad dun sa lugar na tahimik at malamig.

Ilang buwan ding ganito ang sitwasyon nila Karl at Jen hanggang sa bigla lang kailangang matigil. Bakit? Well, you will have to buy the book or watch the film for that. Pero ito lang ang masasabi ko, masalimuot pero maganda ang istorya nito. Makatutuhanan in the sense that nandun yung tunay na human emotions tulad ng confusion, galit, amazement, guilt, regret at love. Mga emosyong tunay mong makikita sa ganitong relasyon lalo pa nga at biglang dapat matapos ang lahat. Higit sa lahat the author was brave enough to delve on the subject na di lang mga sa foreigners uso ang ganitong relasyon. Marahil bihira or baka naman talamak na di lang alam ng marami pero nangyayari ito maging dito sa atin at dito papipilitan ang mambabasang mamulat sa realidad ng ating bagong henerasyon.

A Lesson on Anime from a Parent who loves Anime…

Posted in Anime, Introspection, Random, Uncategorized on June 18, 2012 by otakujade

I’ve been an anime otaku (enthusiast/addict) for most of my life.  My first encounter with anime, and I was not aware it was called that back then, was when I was about 5 or 6 years old.  Voltes V, Mazinger Z and Daimos were my first animes as with most people my age. We are called the Martial Law babies because we were born during the time when Martial Law was in effect in our country…but enough about that.

Children today have no idea what anime went through in this country. Today, anime is as common to them as their computers or video games or even their cellular phones. But anime suffered a big set back in this country in the late 70s when it was banned.  Yes, banned! It started with Voltes V but the others soon followed… this was under Martial Law, and the next decade all we had were cartoons from the US.

Then in 1989 anime made a come back in our country. Slowly but surely, anime began to take hold of the young people’s attention. It wasn’t until 1998 however that anime exploded and gained incredible grounds. This was all due to one kick ass anime – Yuyu Hakusho.

Being an avid otaku, I am thrilled with the proliferation of anime in this country. I encourage it, not only on my own children (my husband is an otaku such as myself) but also on other young people who just entered into the fold. But being a parent and having slowly matured and transitioned with anime over the years I guess I became so much more aware of it and all its eccentricities.

We are often told that as parents we must monitor what our children watches or does on the computer…sadly very few people  heed that plea. But WE REALLY SHOULD. When we see our kids watching anime…remember that these are not just plain cartoons as we were used to watching way back in the 80s. Unlike most animation videos, anime has different genres that we as parents must be aware of but must also keep an open-mind.

What I found out from associating with other parents who were anime fans like we were is that we are a lot more broad-minded with what our children can watch but also a lot more careful at letting them watch certain animes.

Like movies, animes are multi-themed and are directed at certain type of audiences. However, they are more free-spirited and therefore contain certain materials that we will not see on ordinary cartoons. Yes, anime has deeper plots and has so much more value but there are also animes that in my opinion on those with matured minds should watch and I am not talking here only of hentais (x-rated animes).

At a certain point, teenagers will be curious about hentai and that is only natural especially if they’re anime fans. It’s inevitable..they will come across the genre during the course of their fascination with anime. And as parents we must learn to cope with that and deal with it, by being open to them and letting them know that we understand and explain to them the reason why we would rather not have them watching those type of animes before they are 16 or older. I do believe that if you have a good relationship with your child it’ll work to talk things out with them. It’s not gonna be easy but it’s better than flat out telling them they can’t watch it or pretending you didn’t see. Hubby and I actually went so far as to toss a coin to decide who would talk to the boys about it…incidentally, I lost.

But as I said I was not referring to hentai when I said that there are animes that are better left to mature individuals especially those who have matured into anime already. Here applies the Japanese principle of Omote (outer) and Ura (inner) thoughts. It’s the front and back; what you let people see and know and that part of you that is kept hidden…orif you want to take it one step further it can be your Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde.

As there are plenty of well made and extremely good anime which are children and teenager safe (hahaha!) there are also animes that are…well, Mr. Hyde. Good thing though that they are only a few of them. These animes, for which I will not give any titles, should be kept from your children because there just too much violence and sex in them. And this statement is coming from someone who you grew up and grew old with anime. My tolerance for sex and violence is I guess quite broad but even I could balked at letting my teenagers watch these anime. Maybe when they get older….hopefully, around 40 (*smiles*) they can get to watch things like these but not while they are young and impressionable.

So, my plea to parents please get to know your children and get to know what they like, what they watch on TV and what they do in the computer. It pays to be informed and it’s not invading their privacy…it’s protecting their future.

Revisiting Dante’s Inferno..

Posted in Uncategorized on February 1, 2012 by otakujade

It’s been years since I last thought of the Dante Alighieri’s work, “Inferno” (or Dante’s Inferno) that is until my husband got so interested in this divine comedy after finding a trial version of the EA game of the same title. And so as he began searching for the game in nearly every game shop near where we live (took him almost a month to find a copy) I started re-reading Dante’s poem.

The poem was originally titled by Dante as simply “Commedia” or comedy referring to the medieval sense of the word as a story with happy ending as opposed to what we now know as a funny story. As characteristic of medieval work the poem is filled with symbolism.  The theme of contrapasso, a sort of poetic justice, is prevalent in the entire poem  where sinners are punished based on their sins while they are alive.  For example, the first circle of hell was called the Limbo where the unbaptized and virtuous pagans dwell in a deficient form of heaven; they know no joy or sorrow but instead stare in the beyond…unfeeling.

As Dante and Virgil descend through the bowels of hell, Dante is slowly confronted with the realization that he had made the wrong choices in his life. Dante was crusader, he killed and tortured people he believed to be heathens because his church sanctioned the deed. he believed himself righteous, justified and absolved – only to realize in the end that no man can forgive sin except for God Himself.  He realized that the priests lied when they said the murders he had done in the name of the church were already forgiven. In the end, a taking human life whether christian or pagan is still considered murder in the eyes of God.

 

Heroes of Olympus (Book 2): The Son of Neptune

Posted in Books, People, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , on November 9, 2011 by otakujade

The Son of Neptune is the second in the series of the Heroes of Olympus in which Rick Riordan has graciously given us back the characters we have come to love and feared we will miss after the end of the final book of the Camp Half Blood series – the Last Olympian.

If there was one thing I realized after reading Son of Neptune – its the fact that I am a bonafide Percy Jackson fan! *blush* I have read the five books of the first series and then moved on to read the first book of the Kane Chronicles – the Red Pyramid. Sadly, I found out that I actually refer Greek myths to Egyptian myths, it’s probably because I like the free-spirit and independent Greeks to the stoic and comformist Romans, I’m not sure; and that I like Percy Jackson over and above all the characters Rick Riordan created.  I guess it must be because of all his characters Percy was the one with the most developed personality. He did have 5 books behind him, more than enough time for Rick Riordan to fully develop him into a believable character. Add to that the fact that among all his characters Percy seemed have that solid combination of smarts, a bit of teenage angst and humor.

I read book one of the series, The Lost Hero, but even though I am, as a reader, is reunited with Grover and Annabeth and the book was exciting in its own way but even then you always feel like you want to know where Percy. I mean, I personally, kept expecting a clue to appear as to Percy’s whereabouts. I mean, even if he was not in the book the title still feels like it was referring to him, right? Although, now I realized it might also refer to Jason Grace as he was lost too, but whatever to me it means Percy being lost.

So needless to say that I thoroughly enjoyed book 2 of the Heroes of Olympus series..and I can’t wait for the next installment which unfortunately won’t be coming out until next year. Hmp! It’s like I’m back to waiting for Harry Potter again.  I must admit that as a character Harry Potter was better developed and a lot darker than Percy Jackson but somehow..Percy is filling the void that Harry left behind. I still miss Harry and I really wish there would be more books written about him or relative to the Potter series…BUT that’s a completely different story and blog all together. For now allow me to stick to Percy Jackson.

Book 2 (Son of Neptune) began almost exactly where book 1 left off. Almost because, in the first chapter of the book we were informed of what had happened to Percy in the last 8 months. While Jason Grace was running around with Grover and Annabeth trying to stay alive while the forces of Gaea came after them; Percy was asleep. Yes, he was put to sleep by Hera in her personality as Juno in order to keep him alive and when he woke up he had lost some of his memories (again a work of Juno) in order for him be open enough to the training by Lupa. After training for some time with Lupa, Percy was allowed to leave the wolf’s haven and go out in search of himself. Apparently, the lost of his memory was actually to keep him safe, and the same thing was done to Jason Grace however Jason was not put to sleep. I do not understand yet the reason for the difference in their treatment but what was clear what that it had to be done so that they would be safe from the other camp.

It was all Hera/Juno’s master plan. The exchange of heroes was need to unite the two forces and in turn have them help to save Olympus. Apparently, the Greek camp and the Roman camp hate each other with a vengence and that a member of the opposing camp would most probably be harmed if they happen to come across members of the other camp which was sure to happen considering that Percy was taken to the San Francisco where Camp Jupiter is and Jason Grace was taken to New York where Camp Half Blood is.  It is important to note here that the gods and goddesses seemed to be a lot more mellow and rational and less whimsical in their Roman state than in their Greek persona. Ares actually made a point of talking to Percy and he actually cared about his children as Mars; and  Hera was able to set her hatred aside and determined to help Percy in any way she can in her persona as Juno.  Percy naturally was apprehensive of the changes and continued to be so until the end of the book.

Now as we saw Jason team up with Anabeth and Grover, Percy the amiable guy as ever was able to team up with two exciting (or were they exciting because they were with Percy?) in any case he teamed up with Hazel (daughter of Hades) and Frank Zhang (the son of Mars). Both characters have very interesting and dark backgrounds which only add to the allure of the book. I am be getting ahead of myself here but it just seemed like Riordan seemed to write more exciting scenes when he write with Percy than with his other characters. Honestly, Red Pyramid nearly put me to sleep.

I will go into details of what happened in the book as I would really like whoever is reading this review to go out and read the books for themselves. However, I will say that it was an exciting and beautiful ride. The ending was satisfying enough as all the major issues in the book was resolved but it left some one bigger issues that needed to be resolve in another book. I mean, you feel contented and yet you can’t wait for the next installment. At least that’s how I feel.